Saturday, November 29, 2008
24) It's time for another episode of dumb things I did in college!
Thursday, November 27, 2008
23) I can't believe I didn't take a picture!
22) Boom-dee-ah-da, boom-dee-ah-da, boom-dee-ah-da, boom-dee-ah-da.
Tomorrow I'm going to review the meal so tonight I will be sharing what I'm thankful for.
It's funny when you think about it, it's really difficult for someone like me to be thankful for food, clothes, shelter, relative safety, all the things that a person needs to thrive because I've never been deprived of those sorts of things. It's like being thankful for air. I know that there's people who have asphyxiated, who have drowned or nearly drowned, who have diseases where they can't get enough oxygen. But it's sort of distant, unrelated to me. So when a person such as a news anchor says they're thankful for all these things, it sort of rings hollow.
So, it goes without saying that I'm thankful for all of the things that I need in life and all of the things I was born into. But there are some things that fairly often I stop and think, “Damn. I'm lucky to have this.”
I'm thankful that I have two jobs and that they're both pretty stable.
I'm thankful that I have health insurance.
I'm thankful that I am allowed to be an atheist, even if my family doesn't know about it.
I'm thankful for my college degree.
I'm thankful for the internet and the wealth of knowledge it affords me.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
21) Stoopid work
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
20) Making the food for the day of the thanksgiving
Monday, November 24, 2008
19) Originally posted as a reply on Facebook
Sunday, November 23, 2008
18) Don't go gently
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather one should aim to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, glass of Scotch in the other, your body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'Man, what a ride!'"
The other common reading replaces scotch with red wine.
It's bothered me ever since the first time I read it. I mean, I enjoy dark chocolate and red wine (red wine drunk: ain't no better drunk) but what kind of person's life is all about booze and candy? And if your body is used up and worn out, you're not going to be sliding in sideways, you're going to be wheeled in by a nurse's aide who does not get paid enough.
If you're screaming "Man, what a ride!" doesn't that mean you're still excited about life? Such a feeling about life would be more consistent with two burly male nurses hoisting you up by the forearms, your dangling legs wildly kicking ineffectually, your glass of 19 year old single malt spilling all over one nurse's white starched uniform. Right?
It seems that the author of the quote equates taken care of with well-preserved and well-preserved with kept safe and boring. As if getting your teeth cleaned once in a while means you have no sense of adventure. As if lifting weights means you have no joie de vivre.
When I die, I don't want to be wrung out. I don't want my mind eaten away. I don't want to be almost immobile. I want to be vital. I want to have friends. I want to have family. In short, I want to have unfinished business. Not things I will have regretted never getting around to, but a quilt I was working on, a trip I was saving up for, a vegetable garden to harvest. But, I want to be ready. When I die, I want my last thought to be, "But I was in the middle of- oh well, it's been a good ride and I have few regrets."
Saturday, November 22, 2008
17) More Google Flu Trends-service
You really expected me to finish the story today? Ha!
Went to the doctor today. I haven't been to any medical practitioner aside from the eye doctor in three years. Yes, even *rubs teeth*. I blame the whole orthodontic thing for making me say "fuck it!"
Anyway, I do have swollen tonsils and lymph nodes in my neck. No fever, everything else is normal. I definitely do not have strep throat but a really wussy version of the flu has not been ruled out. In the same sense that mono and I dunno, pneumonia haven't been ruled out. "But for the past few weeks I have been feeling short of breath when I do small amounts of phsyical exertion. Like getting out of bed in the morning." "Have you been having heavier than normal periods?" "Not that I'm aware of..." "Yeah... we're doing a blood test. Second door on your left." Damn. Wait about ten minutes, nurse takes blood sample, tells me they'll have an answer in two to three days.
So, the thing about me is that I can donate blood and immediately stand up and walk out without feeling more than that dull ache in the donor arm. I mean, I don't because, free cookies and soda. Ohhh, but not today. I'm pretty sure they drew about... 1/4 cup of blood? For those in the audience who suck at math, that's 1/8 of a standard blood donation. Yeah, my body didn't agree. "Hey, let's pretend like we're thisclose to passing out for the next hour! And let's be all achy and shit! Right arm, that goes double for you!" Seriously, not cool, body.
But the power went out at work an hour and a half before I was supposed to get off and because of all this excitement, the CEO turned into a twitchy Ricky Ricardo for about ten minutes so the day wasn't a total loss.
Friday, November 21, 2008
16) Plain, part 1
The old lady stepped out of the grocery store just in time to see the bus pull away. She now wished that she hadn't bought the chicken because now she would have to walk home. Sometimes she wished that she had not sold her car. She told the person who bought it that she couldn't afford to pay for the car anymore. She did not tell the buyer that she had paid off the car years ago.
She didn't have mirrors in her home. No point. She had not exactly been a looker even in her best years and age had not been kind to her features. She had never been one for dressing flashily and the only time she wore makeup was for her sister's wedding. She never herself married and had never been in a serious relationship.
I bet now you expect me to say something like, "But there was a man. Once. The woman didn't like to be reminded of it, of what might have been." But that would be a lie.
Continued tomorrow.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
15) Guess Google Flu Trends will love this one...
Bleh. I don't know if I'll be staying home from work tomorrow. Guess I'll see how I feel in a couple of hours.
So anyway, my room is finally finished being painted. I've been working on it on and off for the past two months, stretching a two weekend project past all reasonable bounds. At least when I worked at Express I had the excuse of being fucking exhausted all the time. Now I'm just being lazy. But aside from maybe repainting part of the vanity and removing the painter's tape, I'm done. Well, I'm done. Someone else is doing the trim.
And now I get to plow in part of the backyard and install a drip irrigation system.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
14) Plugging in to the community
God, I sound like one of the characters in Waking Life- "He's all action and no theory, we're all theory and no action."
Monday, November 17, 2008
13) I swear I didn't plan to do something lucky.
Type in web address into Google. Business's old web page with basically the same info pops up. Click. "This domain name unregistered." Huh, guess they finally decided to give that website up. Oh, well. I'll just go to the regular website.
Couple hours later: "So *old website* has a really high position in Google" "Yeah, but we're not using the old address, anymore and the new one isn't as high." "The hell are you talking about?"
Couple minutes later: "Those sneaky sons of bitches. And we haven't checked that website in months. And we wouldn't a' checked it for another couple. Guess I'll be making a phone call tomorrow. And if they don't refund our money?" "Yeah?" "It's clobberin' time."
I seem to have a knack for catching things riiiiight before they become a problem. This means that when you're about to dive headfirst into a pool of deceptively deep-looking water, I'm going to come wading by and ask you why the hell you're standing weird. But I'm also going to open the door right as the last strand of rope gives way and the chandelier comes crashing down. I swear, it wasn't my fault.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
12) Chomp
Saturday, November 15, 2008
11) Don't ask me to explain it.
Friday, November 14, 2008
10) The first of many song reviews?
I'm certified on the internet read about it" and "Put it in your search engine" the artist remains ambiguous as to whether the protagonist actually is aware of the fact that she is only famous in the context of the Internet.
In the pseudo-call-and-response lyrics of the hook "(You ain't nobody) Google me baby!/You better ask somebody" and the repetition tinged with desperation of the words "Google me baby", the artist demonstrates that the protagonist has created a bubble where she is a sought-after individual and will seek to perpetuate that bubble as long as she can, promoting herself at every opportunity, seeking to make it reality or at least driving away all those who would demonstrate otherwise. The lyrics "You ain't even gotta ask nobody bout me." seem to also suggest that the protagonist fears that if she were to honestly seek the opinions of others, they will force her to face the fact that her fame is fleeting and small. The previously alluded-to pseudo-call-and-response in the hook is of considerable interest because the protagonist seems to pursue her ersatz fame with an almost religious fervor. Also, one notices that the artist has a male telling the protagonist she is a nobody and saying nothing else. This may seem to be simply a case of the artist following the form of the genre but in fact the use of a male to symbolize the collective opinion of everyone outside of her bubble is a brilliant use of the framework of the pop song since in the context of such a song, one does not have much time to establish a dichotomy between the singer and the rest fo the world.
The true bit of genius in this song comes during the bridge. Ordinarily in songs where peppy lyrics belie the reality of the situation, the artist will plainly state that everything sung before was false the song "Coin Operated Boy" by the Dresden Dolls to use an example. The author here is much subtler. She plays up the minor key, mournfully singing about being in magazines and limousines. We are meant to infer that these things are not actually happening but she strongly wants to believe that they are. She even says "So you can go 'head & give me my shine," implying that she is waiting for someone to take notice of her. She finishes by saying "You ain't gotta believe me/ Google me baby," and again repeatedly tells people to Google her, because she is beginning to not believe herself and she needs to have reassurance that her fame has not ended yet.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
9) Or I could just keep bees...
My hometown needs a good coffeeshop. We had one. I know, I used to make drinks there. Damn good drinks, too. Best cappuccinos in the metroplex. That's another thing to add to the list of things that Austin has that Dallas doesn't: A good coffeehouse within walking distance. Hell, even the 7-11 has good coffee. The kicker is I finally tried a really good place less than a week before I moved back here. Oh, well. Makes me appreciate good coffee all the more. And probably saves me a shitload of money.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
8) Atheist prayer
A religious person asks how an atheist can find the universe to be so full of wonder if our existence is just some random insignificant blip in the universe, if we don't matter on a cosmic scale. The atheist says, it's the most liberating and terrifying thing in the world! Or maybe the atheist says "meh". We're all different, donchaknow. But it means there is no all-powerful being with the answers, that we can go on learning forever. Every thing has a why and nothing has a because. What could be more maddening? What could be more exciting? It means there's nobody watching out for us. We have to make our own way, we have to take care of ourselves and watch out for each other because we're all we have.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
7) Yeah, I watched the Keith Olberman video.
The text of Prop 8 is as follows:
PROPOSITION 8
This initiative measure is submitted to the people in accordance with the provisions of Article II, Section 8, of the California Constitution.
This initiative measure expressly amends the California Constitution by adding a section thereto; therefore, new provisions proposed to be added are printed in italic type to indicate that they are new.
SECTION 1. Title
This measure shall be known and may be cited as the “California Marriage Protection Act.”
SECTION 2. Section 7.5 is added to Article I of the California Constitution, to read:
SEC. 7.5. Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California
It's on page 128 (or 49 of 62) of this PDF.
It's weird to think that only five or six years ago, I probably would have been all for Prop 8 and yet today, I can't quite wrap my head around the idea that so many people would be so petty as to amend their constituion to make gay marriage illegal. That so many people would have been so spiteful as to sign their name on a petition for it. That someone would have been so vindictive as to go through the steps to create said petition and travel around getting the necessary signatures to put it on the ballot. After all, they weren't preventing anybody from going through a religious ceremony. They weren't outlawing gays from putting on their tuxes and civilly uniting. As far as I understand the proposition, they weren't even preventing gays from having something that had all the same legal rights as marriage but with a different name. That's why it's petty.
It's just a word. A word that in varying societies is between one man and potentially several women, one man and one woman who've never met before and didn't agree to the terms, one man and one woman who can stop being an and through a long and expensive legal process, between one geriatric millionaire and one nubile young stripper, or between one princess of a weak country and one prince who will be gaining some new land on his wedding day.
Our country managed to get along for many years just fine without people dictating what gender combination had to be in place for two people to marry. Sometimes it's better to leave things as they are.
6) I caused the credit crunch.
We all have ourselves to blame.
When you bought that shirt that you really couldn't afford but you "deserved" it and you put it on your credit card?
When you couldn't to pay off the credit card this month but you could afford to eat out twice a week?
When you decided you wanted a house and you went with the bank's advice to lie about how much you made?
When that investor bought a bunch of securities without reading the fine print.
When I convinced you to open up a credit card account with my store even though you already had four maxed out? And I knew about it? And told you about how you could get another shirt for only $20 more?
When I said it was disgusting that that company had huge layoffs and gave the CEO a raise and then I turned around and bought something from them that afternoon?
Yes, executive boards fire half the company due to their own incompetence then give them raises. Yes, banks told customers to lie about how much they made and then sold off the loans to people who basically immediately jacked up the interest rates. Yes, companies shove credit cards down our throats. Yes, they bombard us with marketing.
But you know what, at every chance we had a fucking choice.
Look, society's only going to improve when we accept responsibility for our actions. And by accept responsibility, I don't mean demand retribution or curse ourselves and our bad luck. No, own it. And work to fix it. Pay off that credit card (but don't close it- just every once in a while put what you were going to put on the debit card anyway on the CC and set it up to pay the whole thing off at the end of the month automatically), eat in more (you'll lose weight and feel better), start a garden (seeds are cheap), cruise the thrift stores (they have cooler clothes, anyway), but don't sit on your ass feeling sorry for yourself and waiting for the gubmint to send you a stimulus check.
Monday, November 10, 2008
5) I really need an alarm to remind me to do this.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
4) 4′33″
The pull-chain clinking against the light fixture. The longer one is the perfect length to achieve harmonic resonance so it swings wildly.
The groan of bedsprings.
Feet slap against cold faux wood flooring.
The floor creaks where the carpeting was laid down improperly.
Earrings tap together as I run around looking for a pair of sunglasses.
I turn the door handle. Small metal bits slide against one another. The door was cut a little too long, it drags against the carpet with a ffffff. A thud and a click and the door is shut.
A slight wind makes the trees go shhhh.
Scrapes and crackles as I walk down the driveway littered with pecan shells.
I rummage in my purse. Bits of plastic clack together. A bottle of ibuprofen rattles around. My keys jingle as I pull them out.
I press a button, four simultaneous clicks as the locks disengage.
My key grates against the pins in the lock. The car dings. I haven't put my seatbelt on. I turn the key, the car chugchugchugchugchugchugaWHOOMs into life.
The car gripes as I shift into drive. The air swishes around the car, twigs crunch under the tires.
A light eeee as I apply the breaks. I rummage in my purse again, pull out the face plate to my stereo, click it into place, and turn on some music.
3) Only my third day and I'm already slipping.
Okay, seriously, what the hell is wrong with us? What is wrong with this part of the country? What is wrong with this state? We became a state because we wanted to own slaves, and mean ol' Mexico didn't want any of it. Some pussy-ass human rights shit. Sure, we were a country for a few years but we joined the US the first chance we got. Texas. Exists. Because. People. Wanted. To. Own. Slaves. We got off to a bad start. We've had two female governors but one was only elected because her husband wasn't allowed to be in office anymore and the other one was a tobacco lobbyist!
I didn't realize how much I missed Austin and the culture and liberalness of Austin until I went there for Halloween and voting. I think I'm either going to have to move back there or somewhere up north so I don't lose it. Is there a place such that they are reasonably accepting of atheists? Where you can have an intelligent discussion about science or a book or hell, even an actual intelligent discussion of a movie? I sort of had that in Austin, but I lived in a co-op. The nonreligious seem to be attracted to such things. I want to live somewhere where I can have a tiny house with a good-sized yard and a huge vegetable garden. I want to be within biking distance of a grocery store and a decent restaurant or two. I want to not need a car except for lugging heavy stuff. I want to be able to occasionally say off-the-wall things without people thinking I'm completely insane. I don't have this in Dallas. I miss it. Bad.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
2) It's gonna be Obama-related posts for a while. So... just deal, zero people who are reading out there.
I fear for him because Obama doesn't just have political opponents after him, he has people that think he is an abomination, residue of miscegenation. People see him and come to the conclusion that hey, maybe this whole racial mixing thing isn't so bad (because apparently everyone is stuck in 1957 and nobody has heard of CLINAL VARIATION) and there goes the pure white race.
I fear that some crazy stupid redneck fuck who would rather blame his inadequacies on them blacks gettin' uppity is going to through sheer lunacy come up with an assasination plot that nobody has though of yet. I only hope that the ones intelligent enough to not get caught beforehand are also intelligent enough to know that the backlash (and there's a lot of us who feel enfranchised for the first time in our lives and really, really like it) wouldn't be worth it.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
1) One post every day for 365 days.
I will post something on this blog every single day from now until November 4, 2009. It could be musings, poetry (ha!), jokes, stream-of-consciousness writings, whatever. Why am I doing this? I was inspired by a guy I heard of (really wish I knew who it was) who drew something every day for a year, and by the end of the year his drawing skills went from total crap to quite impressive, not trying to study drawing or anything. I want to improve my writing skills and while I'm definitely in the top half, why not improve on what skills I have? Also, I think it will be good for me just to have something that I'm plugging away at every single day.
My rules:
At least 12 hours between posts that count for the day. I don't want to get into the habit of posting something at, say, 11:56 pm and then posting something at 12:05 am and being done for the next day. That's a good way to forget if I've posted or not.
At most 24 hours between posts, barring a situation where I don't have internet access. In that case, I will write something and post it a soon as possible.
No starting the day's post before 12:00 am.
Each post that counts for the day must be at least 200 words long. This ensures a good faith effort to write a real blog post and not just something that's meant to count for the day.
This isn't birth control, it's a diet. If I fuck up and miss a day or two, I won't throw the blog out and start a new one on Sunday. I will post as soon as possible and add more days on the end until I've reached my goal.
I may have to add more rules as I see fit, but I think this creates a good place to start. If anybody reads this, this is important to me so if you notice I've been slacking, remind me of my commitment to myself.