Saturday, November 22, 2008

17) More Google Flu Trends-service

Yeah, just think of the implications of that title. Actually don't.

You really expected me to finish the story today? Ha!

Went to the doctor today. I haven't been to any medical practitioner aside from the eye doctor in three years. Yes, even *rubs teeth*. I blame the whole orthodontic thing for making me say "fuck it!"

Anyway, I do have swollen tonsils and lymph nodes in my neck. No fever, everything else is normal. I definitely do not have strep throat but a really wussy version of the flu has not been ruled out. In the same sense that mono and I dunno, pneumonia haven't been ruled out. "But for the past few weeks I have been feeling short of breath when I do small amounts of phsyical exertion. Like getting out of bed in the morning." "Have you been having heavier than normal periods?" "Not that I'm aware of..." "Yeah... we're doing a blood test. Second door on your left." Damn. Wait about ten minutes, nurse takes blood sample, tells me they'll have an answer in two to three days.

So, the thing about me is that I can donate blood and immediately stand up and walk out without feeling more than that dull ache in the donor arm. I mean, I don't because, free cookies and soda. Ohhh, but not today. I'm pretty sure they drew about... 1/4 cup of blood? For those in the audience who suck at math, that's 1/8 of a standard blood donation. Yeah, my body didn't agree. "Hey, let's pretend like we're thisclose to passing out for the next hour! And let's be all achy and shit! Right arm, that goes double for you!" Seriously, not cool, body.

But the power went out at work an hour and a half before I was supposed to get off and because of all this excitement, the CEO turned into a twitchy Ricky Ricardo for about ten minutes so the day wasn't a total loss.

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